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Bender 6 hours ago [-]
Turn all the under-mountain missile cities into super-mega-mall-cities with Whole Foods, McDonalds, indoor shooting ranges, nail salons, super-walmarts, hotels, apartments, casinos, mega strip clubs and free e-bikes to get from business to business as the tunnels go on for miles. Free unlimited, uncensored WiFi, everywhere. Air conditioning, everywhere. Make each section walking-friendly. Import millions of tourists. Free around-the-clock child care. Customer service center at every entrance with scantily clad male and female greeters that know how to say "I Love You" in every language. Free insulated water bottles with US and Iranian flag logos and unlimited free refills of any drink. Adult VR video viewing massage booths in every tunnel. Free DMT IV drip booths. Free Carls Jr. vending machines. Free trains, busses and camels that transport or relocate people from their homes to the apartments or hotels in the tunnels. Free health spa. Free tattoos with exotic inks that glow. VIP tunnels for wealthy tourists that lead directly to underground high security parking for the casinos with VIP casino entrance and private rooms. Sulfur hot tubs. Medical spa with full time doctors and nurses, waiting room has VR video games.
How to pay for this? Sell their boring equipment. They can bore through solid granite at a relatively high speed. It should cover all of the above for years. After that runs out augment funds with some oil revenue. Get investors from around the world. Convert Iran into the tourist capital of the world and the place of least regulations. Or keep the boring equipment and keep adding new businesses, hotels and apartments.
Most Iranian civilians should enjoy. Some IRGC may be turned. The ones that are not turned will not be able to resist checking it out. Some will come around with time. It's on Mossad to get the remaining hold-outs into a DMT and/or massage booth.
Veteran, not active duty. Hope it still counts.
emchammer 3 hours ago [-]
There would be much time for breeding prodigiously, with a ratio of say 10 females to each male. Could be selected by a computer.
AnonymousPlanet 4 hours ago [-]
This sounds like an abandoned Async ad for the backrooms.
burnt-resistor 5 hours ago [-]
Uh the problem is Iranians have no purchasing power because of runaway inflation due to crushing US-imposed sanctions. None of the above would be possible without first ending sanctions.
cineticdaffodil 5 hours ago [-]
Sanctions where circumvented by russia and china. The economic malaise was caused by using the oil wealth to fund proxxies.
Bender 5 hours ago [-]
Ending sanctions would be part of the deal and of course required to sell the boring equipment and to get oil revenue fully back online.
Bender 2 hours ago [-]
I should add, maybe give each family $100k. $500k to each family that lost kids in that school.
BugsJustFindMe 5 hours ago [-]
To punish them for being invaded by us? The abuser saying "Why did you make me hit you?"
thomassmith65 3 hours ago [-]
Even if one is against bombing Iran on account of its civilians, one shouldn't act like Iran under its current rulers is a peace-loving nation that keeps to itself. I'll join the chorus if Trump bombs Greenland or Canada.
lenkite 41 minutes ago [-]
You can say that about most US allies in the middle-east. I don't see the US waging war on them.
BugsJustFindMe 2 hours ago [-]
> one shouldn't act like Iran under its current rulers is a peace-loving nation that keeps to itself.
I guess the US should be bombed too by that logic.
pstuart 3 hours ago [-]
We had to destroy the village to save it.
bushwart 7 hours ago [-]
>“We are looking for new creative and unconventional ways to pressure and punish Iran,” an officer in US Central Command’s intelligence branch wrote in a message sent Wednesday to a broad group of military analysts, according to a source familiar with the message. A second source also said that a senior US military officer sent the message last week soliciting new ideas for how to deal with Iran.
Still somewhat better than just asking ChatGPT, I guess?
Tostino 5 hours ago [-]
They've been doing that (ask an LLM) since the start, and look at how much "success" we've had!
7 hours ago [-]
RaftPeople 4 hours ago [-]
Re-route all phone traffic to Comcast Customer Service.
eth0up 4 hours ago [-]
You have no idea what you've unleashed. What if this is actually done? They said "punish", not eternal damnation! Somehow, we must prevent CENTCOM from finding this comment. We can get away with abducting Venezuelan presidents, even prejudicial executions of narco sailors, but this would set a precedent the world cannot afford.
And I think you should consider some serious self reflection. If you are having such extreme ideation, you may need help.
q8zd3 5 hours ago [-]
Someone who had no idea where he was getting himself into has no idea how to leave.
seanhunter 5 hours ago [-]
Airdrop Hershey’s chocolate over Tehran.
burnt-resistor 5 hours ago [-]
Modern post-enshittification Hershey's chocolate is a war crime for being awful.
nothercastle 5 hours ago [-]
Is it even legal to call that “chocolate adjacent product” chocolate in Europe.
eshack94 5 hours ago [-]
"chocolate product", these days, or so it seems.
blitzar 6 hours ago [-]
Bomb some (more) schools.
Thats bound to punish them and win hearts and minds.
amanaplanacanal 5 hours ago [-]
Here is an idea: the only way to win is a large and extremely costly invasion, actual troops on the ground for probably a decade.
Nobody wants to pay that price. It was insane to start this war, and everybody knew it but Netanyahu and Trump. I can't believe Rubio was stupid enough to go along with it.
Tostino 5 hours ago [-]
American exceptionalism is a poison to the mind. Elect people who are "true believers", and this is the expected outcome.
4 hours ago [-]
pstuart 3 hours ago [-]
What every admin in this century has done is to avoid declaring what construes "winning" -- which is rather convenient to them as far as how they are to be judged on waging that war.
a34729t 4 hours ago [-]
The easiest weapon to use is demographics: Offer a visa to any Iranian woman under 25.
burnt-resistor 5 hours ago [-]
Blast Ted Nugent at them.
lokar 5 hours ago [-]
Air drop kid rock on Tehran
IamtheBulldog 5 hours ago [-]
Without a parachute. win-win.
pvaldes 4 hours ago [-]
Send Trump to Iran. Inside a gift box with a fancy bow. Iran destruction guaranteed.
If you don't believe me, look at the ruins formerly called White House
There is a chance that the ground will open and the strait water will become lava, but is a risk that I'm willing to take
ftlps 6 hours ago [-]
Could be deliberate theater. The real plan is a containment and a slow economic collapse of Iran anyway.
If the EU and Japan pay higher energy costs, that is an added bonus for Trump.
dnemmers 6 hours ago [-]
You say 'The Real Plan' like there was any amount of planning done in the first place. We've now found ourselves on top of a bucking bronco, with every 'exit' looking worse than previous status quo.
129486218 4 hours ago [-]
There are short term and long term plans. The long term plans are:
- Remove Ghaddafi and have chaos in Libya (accomplished).
- Remove Saddam and have chaos in Iraq (accomplished).
- Install a puppet regime in Egypt and suppress the muslim brotherhood (accomplished).
- Remove Assad and install an ex al-Qaeda (note the irony) puppet (accomplished).
- Have regime change in Iran (ongoing).
Syria took nearly a decade. The US does not need outright military victory, it uses proxies and will at some point try to activate the Kurds or someone else.
If Iran is destabilized enough to undermine the Caspian Sea coalition and get the resources of Turkmenistan, that is also a victory. Unless the other theory is right and the US wants to export its resources first.
We don't know the exact plans, but the grand scheme is not Trump's idea. It goes back to the Bush era.
It can be true that Trump was the useful idiot who actually signed off the Iran plan, which another president may not have done. But the plans are there, including Caspian sea plans from decades ago.
general1465 4 hours ago [-]
Or there is no long term plan. Every leader is just larping as Leeroy Jenkins for short term political points which sometimes works (Crimea 2014) but unfortunately for Trump, Israel had wrong intel and whole assumption of regime change in Iran was build on invalid data.
Kind of like Russians storming into Ukraine in 2022 thinking that it is Prague 1968 but it turned out into Afghanistan 1979 and then slowly mutated into World War 1 1914
mittensc 6 hours ago [-]
> Could be deliberate theater. The real plan is a containment and a slow economic collapse of Iran anyway.
Doesn't seem like there's a coherent plan. What you are saying is the old plan from long before Trump, that was torpedoed. Going back to that is saying they've failed in whatever this was.
Also that is iran's plan as well, survive while the US suffers and eventually gives up like Vietnam ...
> If the EU and Japan pay higher energy costs, that is an added bonus for Trump.
US also pays added costs... and Trump is hurting from that
The only one profiting is China since they've mostly transitioned away from oil...
elias_t 5 hours ago [-]
> The only one profiting is China since they've mostly transitioned away from oil...
They had to use their own oil reserves to regulate the market, where they win is in soft power
dnautics 5 hours ago [-]
> soft power
hows that going for them?
elias_t 4 hours ago [-]
> hows that going for them?
"In its July 15 report — based on interviews with more than forty-two thousand people across thirty-six countries — Pew found that China is now viewed more favorably than the United States in most nations surveyed." [0]
> The real plan is a containment and a slow economic collapse of Iran anyway.
Quite optimistic to assume that there ever was a plan. Reminds me of the '4D chess' masterminds sitting in the Kremlin.
delfinom 6 hours ago [-]
Because isolation totally works, looks at Cuba and North Korea
advisedwang 3 hours ago [-]
And Iran, for that matter
garciasn 4 hours ago [-]
I mean, it sorta works; but, only because of sheer luck. Both of those countries have no real power. Cuba, in particular, has negative value on the global scene and NK only has somewhat empty threats of nuclear weapons. The only true fear is dealing with NK's populace flooding into SK or China during any regime collapse.
6 hours ago [-]
peter_d_sherman 4 hours ago [-]
>"US Military asks troops for 'creative and unconventional' ideas to punish Iran"
I don't know, how about:
make peace with them?
?
(I'm guessing that that idea is either too creative and/or too unconventional to be considered! :-) (And yes, I am bracing for the disingenuous one or two line bot comments and downvotes!))
How to pay for this? Sell their boring equipment. They can bore through solid granite at a relatively high speed. It should cover all of the above for years. After that runs out augment funds with some oil revenue. Get investors from around the world. Convert Iran into the tourist capital of the world and the place of least regulations. Or keep the boring equipment and keep adding new businesses, hotels and apartments.
Most Iranian civilians should enjoy. Some IRGC may be turned. The ones that are not turned will not be able to resist checking it out. Some will come around with time. It's on Mossad to get the remaining hold-outs into a DMT and/or massage booth.
Veteran, not active duty. Hope it still counts.
I guess the US should be bombed too by that logic.
Still somewhat better than just asking ChatGPT, I guess?
And I think you should consider some serious self reflection. If you are having such extreme ideation, you may need help.
Thats bound to punish them and win hearts and minds.
Nobody wants to pay that price. It was insane to start this war, and everybody knew it but Netanyahu and Trump. I can't believe Rubio was stupid enough to go along with it.
If you don't believe me, look at the ruins formerly called White House
There is a chance that the ground will open and the strait water will become lava, but is a risk that I'm willing to take
If the EU and Japan pay higher energy costs, that is an added bonus for Trump.
- Remove Ghaddafi and have chaos in Libya (accomplished).
- Remove Saddam and have chaos in Iraq (accomplished).
- Install a puppet regime in Egypt and suppress the muslim brotherhood (accomplished).
- Remove Assad and install an ex al-Qaeda (note the irony) puppet (accomplished).
- Have regime change in Iran (ongoing).
Syria took nearly a decade. The US does not need outright military victory, it uses proxies and will at some point try to activate the Kurds or someone else.
If Iran is destabilized enough to undermine the Caspian Sea coalition and get the resources of Turkmenistan, that is also a victory. Unless the other theory is right and the US wants to export its resources first.
We don't know the exact plans, but the grand scheme is not Trump's idea. It goes back to the Bush era.
It can be true that Trump was the useful idiot who actually signed off the Iran plan, which another president may not have done. But the plans are there, including Caspian sea plans from decades ago.
Kind of like Russians storming into Ukraine in 2022 thinking that it is Prague 1968 but it turned out into Afghanistan 1979 and then slowly mutated into World War 1 1914
Doesn't seem like there's a coherent plan. What you are saying is the old plan from long before Trump, that was torpedoed. Going back to that is saying they've failed in whatever this was.
Also that is iran's plan as well, survive while the US suffers and eventually gives up like Vietnam ...
> If the EU and Japan pay higher energy costs, that is an added bonus for Trump.
US also pays added costs... and Trump is hurting from that
The only one profiting is China since they've mostly transitioned away from oil...
They had to use their own oil reserves to regulate the market, where they win is in soft power
hows that going for them?
"In its July 15 report — based on interviews with more than forty-two thousand people across thirty-six countries — Pew found that China is now viewed more favorably than the United States in most nations surveyed." [0]
[0] https://www.cfr.org/articles/china-now-outranks-the-united-s...
Quite optimistic to assume that there ever was a plan. Reminds me of the '4D chess' masterminds sitting in the Kremlin.
I don't know, how about:
make peace with them?
?
(I'm guessing that that idea is either too creative and/or too unconventional to be considered! :-) (And yes, I am bracing for the disingenuous one or two line bot comments and downvotes!))